Monthly Archive for August, 2008

Why Brett Favre Will Never See My Tits.

Published
by
mamba
on August 7, 2008
in Mamba Moments
. 2 Comments

Yes, folks, this post is about my tits.  

All day long I’ve been hearing and reading about how Brett Favre has been traded to the NY Jets.  This news is bittersweet for me.  On the one hand, as a new football fan, I am excited about the idea of such a football legend descending on a NY team, especially a team like the Jets.  (They need it, they’re cursed. Plus the GIANTS WON THE SUPER BOWL!)  On the other hand, even if I wanted to hit up a Jets game to watch him play, I couldn’t.

Why, do you ask? Well, I thought I’d let my younger self explain this one. Here’s an excerpt from one of my first attempts at blogging: 

 

“T…I…T…S… September 26, 2005″

So there I was…my first Jets game..my first FOOTBALL game for that matter…Giants Stadium.  The day started out wonderfully. I was ruling the beer pong table in the parking lot, even beating the retarded wasted drunk guy that came and demanded to play winner…he was a self-proclaimed sociopath, so you can imagine what I was dealing with here…needless to say I beat him, beat him pretty bad too…it was fun.  So we go into the stadium, get our seats and a beer, and proceed to begin enjoying the first half.  Which, I must add, I was thoroughly enjoying, even though I admit to not being the biggest football fan…it was a good time.  So halftime comes, and my friend and I head over to the turnstyle, where there are at least hundreds, possible closer to a thousand, people standing around…mostly dudes.  My friend had warned me prior to coming, that this is what they do…tell me if you’ve heard this…they single out a girl hanging around the turnstyle and they start chanting “T..I..T..S…TITS TITS TITS!!!!” and they won’t stop until you either flash em or walk away.  Needless to say I got picked out, and instead of being a pussy and walking away, I gave em what they were asking for….why not right??  I mean, listening to them boo you for NOT doing it is WAY worse….  Well, that was all fine and dandy until afterwards, like 30 seconds afterwards, I got tapped on the shoulder by some fat fuckin security guy who makes me go with him.  He drives my friend and I down to the “dungeon” where I got arrested and ejected from the stadium (for good).  WHAT A LOAD OF SHIT!!!  All in the name of a little T..I..T..S….a great day ends like that.  Whatever, I don’t regret doing it, I’ve heard mad girls do it with no repurcussions…so why did I get singled out?  Who knows….whatever….fuck em.

 

Yep, ladies and gentlemen, I was THAT girl.  I might even still be THAT girl, I don’t know.  All I know is that all day long I’ve been reminded of that day.  And even though I got arrested, I got off pretty easy.  I guess I was lucky, or however you want to look at that.  I guess I can hope that Favre will still be around when the new stadium is built, when I can finally try watching another football game.  No flashing this time though. 

Oh, and PS - If any of you are wondering why there are no pictures posted of this Mamba Moment it’s because I don’t have any. Rumor has it, though, that you can catch a glimpse of this EXACT incident on a certain Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel. But you didn’t hear that from me, and no, I won’t tell you which episode.

UPDATE: I did find a picture from that day.  From the moment itself:

T...I...T...S.

 

Music Byte of the Week: The Gaslight Anthem

Published
by
mamba
on August 7, 2008
in Music Bytes
. 0 Comments

I think what I like most about these guys is the story of how they were created. Kerrang!, the world’s biggest selling weekly rock magazine, has spotlighted these guys on the cover of their newest issue.  This is pretty cool, since as writer Ian Winwood puts it, “This is the first time in the history of the magazine that Kerrang! has placed a band who have never before appeared in our pages on the cover.” Pretty much HAD to check them out after reading the article.

The self-described “punk rock soul band” hails from New Brunsick, NJ, a town close to my heart, being a Rutgers alum and all.  I remember the same scene when I was there: basement shows, tons of great friends, new music every week, more talent in one room than you can imagine.  These guys bring me right back there, and it’s invigorating.

You’ll have to buy the magazine to read the story of how Brian Fallon, the band’s singer, decided that this was his life’s calling, but it’s worth it.  It’s one of those stories where a hugely disappointing moment turns into a life-changing revelation, and I think it’s inspiring and hopeful.  These guys just want to make good music and play it for people; they don’t care about being the paparazzi’s next biggest target.  And you know what?  I believe them.  From their upcoming album (their second), The ‘59 Sound please enjoy “The ‘59 Sound”:

Aren’t they super hot?!?

For tour dates, more information, where to buy the album, making new friends, or if you just want to stare at ‘em, go here.  They even have a Wiki page!

 

The Last One.

Published
by
mamba
on August 7, 2008
in Love
. 1 Comment

It’s been 18 days since I last posted anything. Too long. I’m sorry, Internet! Just as I was getting on a roll and had 2.4 of you taking a look here every day or so, POOF! I’m gone. If it makes any difference, I have a reason. A really, really good reason:

DB moved out.

I will not, at this time (maybe ever) go into the sordid, awful, juicy details of it all.  I will not entertain the Why’s, How’s, and What Happened’s.  That wouldn’t be right. It’s too new, too fresh.  I will say that I’m happy to be watching the season finale of So You Think You Can Dance right now instead of the Giants game, but that’s certainly not something that contributed to the current situation.  

Anyhow.  Have you ever wanted to listen to something, or watch something, but didn’t have access to it? And then the moment you stop thinking about it or you forget there it is?  I had that type of experience this week.

As dorky as it may sound, I am a HUGE Friends fan.

Seen every episode, kick ass in the Trivia Game, all that shit.  I don’t care.  When I met DB (again) three years ago, he hated this about me.  He taunted me every time I would watch it.  Over time, however, I started to notice that HE would be laughing along too!  I would bust his chops and he would give me the brush-off.  Only in the last six months have I heard him say, “If you would have told me I would like this show 2 years ago, I would’ve slapped you.”  (Not really, of course.)  We recorded reruns on the DVR.  And watched them daily.  We even downloaded the first season and had a marathon one Saturday because he wanted to “see if there were any he hadn’t already seen” (all manly-like).  I still think he just wanted to watch each episode in order from the beginning.  

DB started to know little details about the characters and their plotlines, it almost got to the point that he remembered more than I did!  He would ask me how the series finale ended, but little details escaped me.  I would always say, “Oh they’ll show the rerun anyday now.”  Mind you, my DVR probably records three different Friends reruns each day, one would think that the chances are pretty high that in three years we’d catch The Last One, no?  

No.  The Last Episode never aired.  Not until Tuesday night that is, the night that DB left.  After I was alone, I sat on the couch, checked the list, and there it was.  

“The Last One”

I mean, what are the chances of THAT?  I watched it, of course, but told my DVR to “Save Until Manually Erased.”  You know, just in case.