Feeding You Daily Nonsense One Byte At A Time.
This woman (Sarah Palin in case you live under a rock you don’t know) is actually starting to make me think that I’m the one who’s missing something. Is she playing a joke on us? Are we on some crazy Truman Show/Punk’d show that she’s the mastermind behind? The line between serious interview and SNL skit is getting really blurry. Boy am I glad she’s nowhere near the White House. And by the sound of it, so is she.
PS - That guy in the background? Straight out of Deliverance. You betcha! (Wink!)
Mr. Supersexy Brad Pitt was on Oprah today to promote his new flick, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. His co-star, Cate Blanchett, was also there. The movie actually looks pretty decent, but since it doesn’t come out until Christmas (which means I can’t illegally download it until at least February), I’ll probably forget about it by then. Regardless, I’ll never pass up a chance to look at Brad Pitt in HD. He’s beautiful.
The only problem was…
SNOOZE-FEST!!!!
How BORING?!? What happened to the edgy, hard-ass, Fight Club Brad Pitt? This guy was totally lame. He couldn’t even name a favorite food of his, saying something like, “I’m liking the Indian.” Or some shit. And while I guess I can see where he could get a little creeped out by the question the following fan asked, he shouldn’t be too surprised that she’s seen a photo of his forearm, seeing as he’s pictured weekly in every tabloid magazine ever. I mean, it’s cool to talk about picking hot dogs out of your kids’ vomit, but you don’t want to say anything about a tattoo on your arm? Really?
Don’t get me wrong. It’s Brad Pitt. He’s a legend. Hottest.Dude.Ever. But he’s all into his family and kids and friggin’ Angelina and for whatever reason it bored me to tears. And Ms. Cate wasn’t picking up any of the slack. Lame show. So whatever, Brad, I’m over you.
And what’s with the stupid ass mustache?!
Whether you’ve been watching or not, the inevitable is happening this evening. Tonight our nation learns who has earned the highest number of votes and the title of “American Idol.”
Once you stop laughing about the absurdity of it all, read on.
Rumor has it that David Archuleta (the little one) is going to take this year’s crown. While I’ll agree that the youngster may have the best singing voice, does he encompass what we think of as an “American Idol”? I think not.
First of all, he’s too young. He’s 17! Has he ever been in a fight? Has he done the dirty yet? Has he had his heart broken? Has he broken his curfew or snuck out of his house? Gotten drunk? I doubt it. He is constantly under the very watchful eye of his father, aka the Stage Dad From Hell, and can barely make his own decisions. This is going to be our American Idol?
Secondly, he’s no diva, not in the way that we Americans have come to know and love “divas.” If you simply take a look at the celebrity guests and mentors that have appeared on the show (Gwen Stefani, Mariah Carey, etc), can you ever really (REALLY) picture Little David in the same category as these artists? At best he’ll become the next Clay Aiken, which is something I think we’d all agree we don’t need a duplicate of.
Lastly, what kind of album will cute Little David grace us with? Certainly no gut-wrenching ballads of love and loss, no pop-style diddies of girls and booze and bling, not anything believable anyway. Isn’t this what we, as faithful American Idols fans, are supposed to listen to these days? Little David will give us the male version of Miley Cyrus, if he’s lucky enough to taste fame as she has. Who will buy his album? Moms will buy his album for their 14-year-old daughters. That’s it.
Does he deserve it? Maybe. Does David Cook deserve it more? That’s a judgment call. All I know is that I’d be more proud of American audiences for picking the more mature, more musically inclined, autonomous, charismatic David over the David whose entire life up to this point has been dictated by his father, who so desperately wants his son to achieve what he himself could not. How does that constitute the label of “idol?” I want my Idol with a side of individuality, thank you very much.
Unfortunately, American Idol has become more of a popularity contest than a talent contest in its truest sense, which is why Little David will most likely come out tonight’s victor. All the tweenage girls across the country will cheer, and I will sit back and wait a couple of years until Little David checks into rehab. Because you know that’s where this is headed.
UPDATE: Good job America!!! Nice choice!
