OK, so this isn’t a “serious” music byte. It’s more like the next YouTube Sensation!! I recently saw this on Katy Perry’s blog, and wouldn’t you know that there are tons more videos just like this? I mean, Gem Sweater? Holy cow. My mom totally had a collection of Gem Sweaters which she would try her damndest to hand down to me. I can’t tell you how many conversations went like this:
Mom: “But there’s nothing wrong with these gem sweaters!!!”
Mamba: “Yea, except they are totally fugly!”
Mom: “You’re so unappreciative!”
I wonder if she would feel the same if I asked her to take them back after all these years. Probably not.
I’ve embedded this particular video just so you can have a bit of an introduction. Please feel free to browse the archives of her YouTube channel for more goodies.
I think I just may have found my Halloween costume for next year.
I’m totally about to drop some astrology knowledge on your asses. I’m no fortune teller, nor am I a tarot card or palm reader or any of that shit. I’m not trying to get you to join any cult or anything. My ears perked up though when I overheard someone discussing their “Saturn Return” and I can honestly say I related to the conversation. I googled a bunch of keywords did some research, and the only reason I am sharing is because I am so there right now, and I’m hoping I’m not alone. So why not ask the internets? They’ll be honest, right?
I feel it necessary to point out that I am a Libra. Libras are also known as the Scales of Balance, basically meaning that we fucking hate it when there is conflict and imbalance in our lives. Our sign is also the only inaminate object of the Zodiac signs, meaning we are neither human nor animal, but dammit! things need to be in order. Anywho….
Apparently somewhere around every 29.5 years the planet Saturn orbits the sun, returning to the same place in the galaxy as when you were born. This happens between the ages of 27-30, 58-60, and 86-88. Did I tell you all I just turned 30? Yea. The “return of Saturn,” as it is called, brings with it an awful mix of challenge, significance, fear, reflection, doubt, prestige, hard lessons, order, confusion, and accomplishment. I mean, seriously? This is a Libra’s nightmare. This is my nightmare, and it’s happening.
Saturn comes to tell you whether or not you’re on the right path in life. If you’re not, Saturn will nag you until you realize you need to change it up. If you are, Saturn will encourage you to stay on the same path.
Need some proof?
Vincent Van Gogh, at age 30, decided to become a painter instead of a minister. Bill Rodgers marked the first of three consecutive Boston Marathon wins, and made the 1976 Olympic running team, all during the course of his Saturn Return.
The U.S. Census Bureau names its peak divorce years at 28-30. You all belong to Facebook, I’m sure most of your childhood friends (and probably you!) are married, having babies, buying houses, the whole nine. (Just want to say - Love you! Better you than me!) Some might be ending those commitments. Some might just be questioning them. So goes the Saturn Return.
One of my all-time faves, No Doubt, released an album entitled “Return of Saturn” around the same time Ms. Gwen Stefani turned 29. The song “New” in my opinion is in direct relation to her return of Saturn, as can be found in the lyrics. Need to read them? Here.
Another total girl crush of mine, Drew Barrymore, attributes her return of Saturn to the changes in her life on her infamous appearance on David Letterman. Yes, that episode. Where she flashed her tits. Don’t remember? Let me refresh:
So this is where I’m at. A total crossroads. Life (and Saturn) has decided to give me the ultimate mid-term exam. Where am I now? Where do I want to go? Am I on the path I’m supposed to be?
What the hell kinds of questions are these and who has the damn answers?? I’ve never passed a test without taking a look at the answer code! It’s not fair! I hate school!
I guess that’s the whole point. Grow the fuck up kid and take a long hard look at where you’re at. Where do you want to go? Who do you want to end up being? Saturn is here to kick your ass into high gear, to show you what you’re made of and show you how to get it. If you listen, awesome. If not, you’ll have another chance in about 29.5 years. But that’s a lot of time to waste.
I feel like I can’t watch TV or go on the internet lately without seeing something pop up about the new movie Twilight. Can’t we all get a chance to read the book first, though? What did they make this movie in like, five minutes? Because just as I started to hear the buzz about the books, POOF! There’s a movie coming out. At least the Harry Potter series gave us a couple of years before we got to see the film version. Either way, I now have a copy of Twilight which I will start reading tomorrow, and I’m hoping that I can stay away from any potential spoilers long enough to finish it. It really ruins the fun of reading a book of you already know what happens.
It’s late. I’m tired. I’ve been super lazy all day because it’s 21 degrees and I’d rather sit on my couch with blankets. I’m late with posting. And so it goes. I have a few good stories to share and they’ll be coming. But not tonight. I need a reprieve. Just one night. Thanks….
This woman (Sarah Palin in case you live under a rock you don’t know) is actually starting to make me think that I’m the one who’s missing something. Is she playing a joke on us? Are we on some crazy Truman Show/Punk’d show that she’s the mastermind behind? The line between serious interview and SNL skit is getting really blurry. Boy am I glad she’s nowhere near the White House. And by the sound of it, so is she.
PS - That guy in the background? Straight out of Deliverance. You betcha! (Wink!)
If you have enough time on your hands to be able to do as many takes as were needed to get this right, well then…you seriously have a lot of time on your hands. I love to play Guitar Hero. Love it! It’s an addiction. When I first brought it home, I don’t think I left my apartment the entire weekend, and got about 4 hours of sleep over three days because I just had to pass this song! Even my mom loves it. No shit!
It’s like once you play you’re never the same. It’s like The Ring, only no creepy wet dead girls climb out of the TV and you don’t die. Unless you’re as hooked as this guy, because he really almost gets hit by a car. This is so awesome, it totally made my day. And now I’m going to go play some Prisoner of Society.
Mr. Supersexy Brad Pitt was on Oprah today to promote his new flick, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. His co-star, Cate Blanchett, was also there. The movie actually looks pretty decent, but since it doesn’t come out until Christmas (which means I can’t illegally download it until at least February), I’ll probably forget about it by then. Regardless, I’ll never pass up a chance to look at Brad Pitt in HD. He’s beautiful.
The only problem was…
SNOOZE-FEST!!!!
How BORING?!? What happened to the edgy, hard-ass, Fight Club Brad Pitt? This guy was totally lame. He couldn’t even name a favorite food of his, saying something like, “I’m liking the Indian.” Or some shit. And while I guess I can see where he could get a little creeped out by the question the following fan asked, he shouldn’t be too surprised that she’s seen a photo of his forearm, seeing as he’s pictured weekly in every tabloid magazine ever. I mean, it’s cool to talk about picking hot dogs out of your kids’ vomit, but you don’t want to say anything about a tattoo on your arm? Really?
Don’t get me wrong. It’s Brad Pitt. He’s a legend. Hottest.Dude.Ever. But he’s all into his family and kids and friggin’ Angelina and for whatever reason it bored me to tears. And Ms. Cate wasn’t picking up any of the slack. Lame show. So whatever, Brad, I’m over you.
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